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Newsletters>
What is your Love Personality?
May 16, 2003
Author: Alina Ruigrok - www.love-sessions.com
Article:
It is an obvious fact that we can learn and know what true
love is. What we are often not aware of though, is that
there are different love trends. Does it even matter if we
understand love trends? If we are in a happy relationship,
then that means it is all fine, right? Yes and No.
Although, your love with your partner might run smoothly
for a while, it can take a turn we often never expect. This
is why knowing about love trends is helpful.
What may have turned you or your partner on at first, might
not be a turn on later. How is this possible if they seemed
so crazy over certain things before? The reason is quite
simple and reasonable. When we first get involved with
people, the attraction and lust is so strong (not that it
would not be later), that the way one seduces the other is
not truly focused on, but simply instantly appreciated,
since they are so drawn to one another.
As the relationship proceeds and the bond builds, you will
start getting in touch with your own style of loving and
expecting your partner to match up to it. At times, this
will be just the case. Couples can share the same love
trend, but at other times, they can differ. If your trends
do differ, do not look at it as negative, but as a way to
combine them and form a creative love trend together. It
should not be one way or the other. There is no such thing
as the wrong way to love, except for obsession, controlling
and abuse, of course-which is not love anyway, although
some feel it is.
How do you even come about recognizing the love personality
of yours or your partners? It is not difficult, but does
require quite a bit amount of observation. Start by making
notes of your romantic qualities and ideas of what great
romance, sex and seduction is to you. Do you like walks on
the beach and dining at cozy, romantic restaurants? Or do
you like setting up your sexual activities by setting up a
scene and playing along with it, or just going with the
flow? By knowing what trend you follow, you will then be
introduced to your romantic identity and know what you need
from your partner.
There are several types of love trends that you should know
about. It will help you come to a deeper understanding of
what type of lover you are and your partner as well.
People, whose personalities follow the emotional trend, are
lovers who pay attention more to the meaning behind things,
instead of the thing itself. A man who does not really care
for picnics on the beach may still love the event due to
the intention behind it. He sees the effort his mate put
into it and sees the love and caring meaning that his mate
had when the idea was thought of and planned. Emotional
lovers are sensitive and love sharing with their partners
and are also very spiritual. They do not hold back from
expressing their true feelings.
A Creative trend follower on the other hand, may have some
of the same traits as an emotional lover, but focuses more
on discovering new things and trying them out, taking risks
for a bigger thrill. They love to plan and be a part of
interesting activities with their lovers because they like
going through adventures and new territories together.
These types of lovers are found to be quite exciting
because they seem to be more mysterious and full of
surprises and imagination.
Then you have the traditional trend follower, who likes to
follow the rules of what society considers the right way to
handle a relationship. They believe in having one partner,
following the dating and romance guides to the point
(bringing a girl some flowers when picking her up at the
door for a date, just to mention one). They also believe in
being organized, being financially responsible and planning
the events that will take place in their lives with their
partners.
Those are the main trends that most people fall into
following. This does not mean that a person who has a
certain love trend cannot carry qualities from other
trends, however. It just means they in general carry that
love personality. There is no trend better than the other
either. Each trend is unique and interesting in it’s own
way. When two people follow the same trend, it is fabulous
because they both know exactly what the other is fond of
and what to expect as well. There are hardly mixed signals.
Having different trends is also a wonderful thing. When a
couple has their individual love personality, it opens the
door for each one to learn new ways to love expressions and
can create a great trend combination!
Considering and accepting our partner’s different trend of
love is extremely important to do. If you do not, it will
seems like you are just determined to have the romance in
your relationship to go your way, by your trend. This will
definitely cause unhappiness and have a very high
possibility for your mate to back away from romance with
you, because he or she will feel that there is lack of
attention towards their needs and trends concerning
romancing. So remember to be considerate and learn to adapt
to their ways too.
It feels fabulous when our lover is being considerate of
our trend, respecting it, following it with us often. You
cannot be the one always being considered however. You will
then become what is called a Constant Receiver. Constant
Receivers are always on the look out for themselves. They
never look beyond their trend and the needs that are
involved with it. They always observe whether or not they
are getting what they need and want from their lovers, and
if they feel they could be getting more, they grab more.
What about your partner? What are his or her needs? Have
you even considered what their trend is about and how you
can compromise and follow theirs sometimes? Never let these
questions go unnoticed. If you find yourself being a
constant receiver, it does not mean you are a bad person,
but that you have been a little careless. When you realize
this, stop yourself and look deep down. You will probably
realize that you are aware of your over receiving, and have
been so flattered by it that you got carried away. Once you
have sorted this out, you can start returning the favor
back to your partner.
Being a Constant Giver also has its down side. Yes, you
would be always pleasing your partner, but what about you?
Is having your trend considered not important? Of course it
is! Do not be too furious with your mate if this happens.
Just remember what you just learned about Constant
Receivers. Your mate most likely did not ignore your trend
needs on purpose, but just got carried away with being
pampered. After all, you did you create this situation when
you were over giving! So many people fall under this
category of giving too much. This is because most people
believe it is more important to please their lovers than
having their own needs and wants fulfilled. Caring about
pleasing your partner is good, but disowning your own
romantic identity and needs, is not. Get back on track by
getting your guilt in order first. Know that you should not
feel guilty for wanting or needing something from your
partner. You are entitled to having those needs fulfilled.
You also should not look at giving as the good thing, while
receiving is the bad thing. They are both good when equally
exchanged. Start bringing your romantic trend and needs to
your mate’s attention. You can do this by bringing up a
good movie that is coming out and letting them know that
you really want to see it. Re-teach them that they should
give too, instead of always receiving from you.
Just highlight the fact that there are different love
trends and that they are all unique and deserve to be
followed and participated in. As a couple, you will not
only please each other, but learn more about the other as
well! As long as you do not forget this and understand the
importance of an equal share between giving and receiving,
your combination of love personalities will live in a
content environment.
Alina Ruigrok is an independent relationship expert for
http://www.love-sessions.com helping those in need of
dating, love, relationship, marital, sexual and other
personal advice through e-sessions.
About the author:
Alina Ruigrok is an independent relationship expert for
http://www.love-sessions.com helping those in need of
dating, love, relationship, marital, sexual and other
personal advice through e-sessions.
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